The Good Old Days

I miss they way things once were. being happy and carefree.there is no such thing as not growing up we all have to at some point. life sucks. i have no job. i need to do something amazing with my life what that is exactly i have no idea. i miss the old days. i miss all the things i used to do. i miss being able to skateboard and play soccer, smoke pot, jam out, go to the movies, no job, talking on the phone all night, innocent kisses, wearing my boy clothes and it being thought of as sexy, my skate shoes, being able to watch cartoons and not be called a loser, being able to have crazy hair colors, being able to chalk it up to being young, being skinny, having your heart broke because you fell in love with every boyfriend you had, i miss middle school, i miss the friends i had back then, i miss not having friends now everyone wants to use you now and if it doesn't help them then they won't bother with you, i remember my firsst boyfriend i never even kissed but just holding hands and hugging was enough back then but not now the world is so horrible now no one is innocent long anymore. i miss the good old days.

On..

a much lighter note. I am beginning to like this new apartment. And jeffs father whom he ahsnt talked to in 4 years and seen in 12 is coming to visit. Plus my birthday was yesterday. Happy 20th to me. I spent it with my family cause they mean the world to me.

To my dearest...

Grandpa. My "paw" as i call him passed away early morning August 18th. He was a good man a GREAT man who did worlds for his family, community, and country. I am thinking of writing a book with him in mind a great inspiration he is. Makes me proud to carry his name. To Glenn Oree Grantham you are in my heart forever. Not a day goes by without the thought of you. I am visiting Granny often. With the upmost love and endearment, Samantha Glenn Grantham.

So today...

we signed the lease for our apartment. yay. so moving time here i come.

also i have become very interested in the bioshock2 arg. awesomeness!!!

I played...

a somewhat scary game. Fun though. Its called ghostscape. look it up.

I feel bad for...

people getting old. Mainly my grandpa. He is suffering in his age and he is so sad he wants to give up and i hope that GOD will take him while he sleeps. Heaven awaits him and i pray for him to go so his suffering will end.

My Grandpa was a good man and lived a good life. He was in the navy part of the seabees. Provider for his family. Police chief and county commissioner. He is still the commissioner and will be till he dies. He is a good man with an even greater heart.

May he live forever in our minds and hearts.

I LOVE YOU PAW.

I have decided...

to do something with my life. Be the person my younger self wanted to be when i grew up. So heres to growing up and accomplishing the many things i have so yet wanted to do. I have been looking at all my friends that i went to school with doing something being someone. and i have decided to join the ranks.
Cheers!!!

My Horoscope...

is fairly right most of the time. It has told me that im lazy which is a true statement (a very true statement at that). So it told me today to stay outta people way today so i didnt blow up on them. So what have i done today nothing except try to pack things but getting to side-tracked to finish one box. So what does that make a bunch of half packed boxes laying around my house and it bothers the shit out of me. But i did have time to remember things.

Mainly I remembered middle school at old junior. I remembered that i didnt know what drugs were really. I wasnt interested in sex. And that the people that i was friends with then are merely people who will talk to me but not go out of their way to do so except for the select few which are still my friends.

Everything was pretty much fun and naive then. As nothing in the world today is. Which makes me sad. I was discusing with my boyfriend the other day about us having kids that at the age of 9 they wouldnt be wanting to have sex with people way to old for them. And i have know a few girls like this and have decided its the parents fault for not protecting them from this sex driven world we live in.

I also found out today that most of the people i went to school with are getting married and having babies. They arent exploring the world like they should be cause when you get older you cant do things like you could in your 20s. And once you have a kid there goes the money. If and when i ever have a kid it will be by the grace of God.

Also i hate people that are to old to be acting like they do. It really ticks me off. Act your age.

Also i have realized that we really should live every day likes its our last.

Today i guess since i didnt get to yell at someone i thought i should just rant on a blog sounds good to me.